Friday Fictioneers 15 February 2013

2013-02-15

Screwed

He reached desperately. Almost… finger just an inch from the button. The floor continuing to liquefy beneath his feet. Jason hanging on to his ankle, uttering terrified moans. Where he had stood, the floor had turned to sludge and Jason splashed in the slurry of dislocated molecules. ‘If only I had listened,’ thought Brian. ‘They told me not to mess with the universe’s structure and they were right. Of course they were.’ His leg sinking deeper, Jason spluttering now. The distance between finger and button grew. Idly, he wondered whether the ripple effect would stop at the door or…

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was time for the Friday Fictioneers already and I did not even manage to post any of the many ideas that ran through my head this week. I still get that, every so often, a couple of days where just getting out of bed and through the day seems almost too hard. But perhaps that is simply part of la condition humaine? I have stopped fighting it or blaming myself. I know it gets better again after a couple of days…

So, as for the Friday Fictioneers: The eminent researcher Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posts an image every week (see her site here) and a great big (and growing) bunch of little lab rats scurry to write a ‘one hundred word story with a beginning, middle and end’. With often excellent results because I am just in my second week and have already read many stories that made me want more, much, much more. I wonder what kind of results Rochelle is getting in her ongoing research on fiction addiction…

This week’s fascinating photograph was made by David Stewart. Go here for this week’s submissions from my fellow lab rats. Click ‘Links in collection’ below the photograph to see the links to their sites and read their stories.

Oh and Rich, including the title my contribution this week is exactly 100 words.

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45 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers 15 February 2013

  1. Dear Iris,
    Now there’s a sticky wicket of a situation. What an eerie use of the prompt. Well done. Happy to see you back and thanks for the glowing endorsement. “Eminent researcher” …I like that. thank you.
    shalom,
    Rochelle

      • Yes… I did have some doubt about that, too. Googling did not make things much clearer though, there seems to be no real consensus. In the end I just went with what felt better. I actually like the fact that it is exactly 100 words. This makes me wonder, by the way: does Rich ADD words when there are too few?

    • Thank you! You brought together a disparate group of people and thereby enriched their lives. In just two weeks, the Friday Fictioneers have certainly enriched mine, They are also giving me renewed confidence in my abilities and that is worth a compliment (or two or three…)

    • Isn’t it wonderful how different everyone’s story is? I have yet to find two in which the underlying idea is the same. I absolutely love how the Friday Fictioneers emphasises and illustrates that we are all unique souls.

      And thank you for the compliment, I am glad you like it!

  2. Dear Iris,

    Loved you story and the way you left the world hanging…..
    The ripple effect will take care of all of our problems very soon.

    C. Hase

    • Thank you! Perhaps it might, but… I might expand on this story because I am curious to see where it will take me (and the world).

  3. Never thought of myself as a “little lab rat” before, but I get what you mean. 100 words is a difficult task as it is easy to run away with a story, once you have an idea. There are some great contributors on Friday Fictioneers and Rochelle does a great job not only setting the prompt, but writing her own story and helping others too where she can.
    Yours is a great take on the prompt this week and I love the way you left us wondering. Well done

    • Thank you! It is difficult, isn’t it? It is just this tantalising bit, of your own story and the stories of others. What I like about it is that you are not committing to something you then need see through (and that keeps frowning angrily at you from somewhere when you least expect it).

  4. I can’t imagine how scary that would be, to start sinking through things. That’s an awesome line, “They told me not to mess with the universe’s structure and they were right.”

  5. Thank you David! I love the photo – it is so different and was taken from such an interesting angle. There is such a sense of motion in it. Other Fictioneers made me see that the hanger-on is a lady. Ah well, it will be a Jason in heels. My therapist is a lady called Hans and everything is possible these days. I am tempted to elaborate on this little story, actually…

  6. Iris, I didn’t enlarge the picture enough to see that there was a person hanging on to (your usage is correct, BTW) the man’s ankle. It doesn’t matter. The prompt’s a starting point anyway and I enjoyed where you went with it.

    janet

    • Thanks, Tom. I had this vision of Rochelle peering at all of us behind glass, industriously pecking away at our keyboards 😉

    • This was a reply to you actually, Pirate: Although Brian does seem fairly resigned. I guess he is leaving the problem for somebody else to solve!

  7. very good work. “dislocated molecules”–favorite image. “mess with the universe’s structure”–another one. “ripple effect”–another. I just like this all the way around it seems.

    ps: my favorite aunt is named Iris.

    • Thank you! I am particularly pleased that you picked some of my favourite images in this little piece of text. Of course, having the same name as your aunt, I am already privileged 😉

  8. Original and very creepy take on the prompt. Well done!

    Regarding word count – I’ve been going by Word’s calculation (I think Word counts five letters as one word). Am I wrong in this? At any rate, it’s a whole lot less time consuming than counting words.

    • Thank you. I go by Word’s count, too. I easily lose count (annoying when knitting, too) so if I had to count the words myself, I would have a serious problem!

  9. Wow, this was something. Molecular dis-balance of the universe. I could have never thought of that. Does his thinking “idly” in the end imply he was losing consciousness?

    • Sometimes being a science geek comes in handy ;-). No… I think he just lets go because at that point, there is nothing he can do. Quite frankly I’m not sure (yet) what happens next.

  10. This story was brilliant – and unique I think (although I’m only half way through the stories written so far!). A great interpretation – and it serves him right for messing with the structure of the universe!

  11. “universe’s structure and they were right.” consider a comma after “structure.” it creates a good pause before the very significant “they were right.” also, grammatically, it is needed, but we don’t totally need to care. also, i’m curious about the single quotes instead of double. i’ve heard this is a british thing. well done piece of work.

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